Friday, September 06, 2019

The Lighter Side of Weight Loss: Chapter Twelve

The Lighter Side of Weight Loss
By Sandra Warholic Seeley

Chapter Twelve

Set yourself up for sleep, which is one of the WW Weekly Topics, sounds like a contradiction unless you are a horse. In that case, not only can you sleep standing up, but you can sleep with your eyes open. Just imagine the possibilities of doing this while being human!

However, according to veterinarian, Dr. Anna O’Brien, horses only snooze standing up, but deep REM sleep lying down.

So whether you are planning on snoozing or REM’ing, it’s still a good idea to set yourself up for success, the ultimate goal being rested and thinner. I would love to follow in Rip Van Winkle’s footsteps in order to sleep for twenty years and wake up thin. Of course, I would not want to age twenty years or miss any revolutions! According to Washington Irving’s story, Rip wanders into the Catskill Mountains with his dog, Wolf, to escape his wife’s nagging. He meets some strangers, drinks their liquor and falls into a twenty year REM sleep.

I have found that sleep is an excellent way to escape reality. One of my nightly routines is to empty and clean my Dream Catcher to clear out any trapped nightmares which allow the good dreams to float into my brain. All kidding aside, I do look forward to dreams involving loved ones and pets no longer with me. It’s great to have a “visit” with Mom or Dad again.

Another routine is to put all my e-toys back in their toybox. Sometimes I wonder if they might become real like The Velveteen Rabbit or wander around my house at night like Corduroy, the little stuffed bear looking for his missing button. Do Siri and Alexa talk to each other after lights out? Does my Chromebook plot with my PC to cause me aggravation? Does my TV watch me sleep and report back to Russia on my nocturnal habits? Note to Russia: Jammies at home are optional, and I will look better after I lose 40 more pounds.

A third calming activity is I am currently reading a chapter before bed of Arianna Huffington’s The Sleep Revolution: Transforming Your Life, One Night at a Time. On the very first night that my life is transformed, I will let all of you know.

In conclusion. Let’s have a virtual sleepover. I will sing you to sleep with Bing Crosby’s “Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep” lullaby.

Until next week: Be rested and happier!

Sandra Warholic Seeley - All my life, and half of someone else's, I have lived in a humorous place called Earth. My muse is a tiny menehune from the island of Oahu in Hawaii where I lived for a year. Ernest Hemingway once sat under the exact same coconut tree where I did most of my writing. I'm also a sensitive to criticism Virgo who loves to get paid for writing and speaking funny stuff. Even though my mind is filled with volcanic ash residue and I'm still finding sand in my shorts, I will continue to write until my muse retires or I run out of pretty blue drinks, whichever comes first. Don't be bashful, email the author.

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