Monday, July 13, 2015

What's a Wolfgang?

As two little girls were walking past our house, I overheard Girl One saying to her friend, "Wolfgang lives here."

Girl Two asked, "What's a Wolfgang?"

That my friends is a very good question. Besides being my faithful assistant for 8 years, Wolfgang wears a lot of collars (and sunglasses).

One of those collars now sports the logo: AARP. According to Dr. Vet, Wolfers is now a senior citizen. No way! Ce n'est pas possible! Both Kanela and The Wolf protest being put into this classification. On my next food foray, I'm going to look for Blue Senior Food for Puppies. This way my puppy can romp and frolic with extra glucosamine and chondroitin for his joints. And just to be on the safe side, AARP's Petplan Insurance will cover any playground injuries.

Another collar reads: Wolfgang the Brave, Protector of His People. Ever vigilant, that's our guy. Every week-day he prepares for the Meals-On-Wheels invasion. Grandma and Wolfgang eagerly await these people for different reasons. Granny just wants to eat her meal, but Wolfgang acts as if he's going to eat the people delivering it. Or he may be a bit perturbed that now that he's a senior, they are not leaving any meals for him.

However, the Mail Lady is someone else eagerly awaited. Wolfgang treats her like his personal ice cream truck. He senses her arrival minutes before she actually arrives. If he can't greet her with wagging tail and open mouth, he knows there will be a treat waiting for him in our mailbox.

Wolfgang is a bit skittish around vacuum cleaners, weed whackers and other loud buzzing machines. I can't blame him though. They scare me, too. His two best friends, Keegan and Frank, sympathize with him and give him phobia advice. Keegan (the Irish Terrier) tells him to run behind his chair if he sees a squirrel or vacuum cleaner. Frank (the Husky/Wolf/Raptor) suggests a low growl if feeling threatened and then turn over for a belly rub.

After a hard day's work assisting me with research and many naps, Wolfgang prepares for bed. His teeth get brushed with his favorite chicken flavored toothpaste, he watches the news for funny story ideas, he makes sure all of his people are in the house and curls up with me for sweet dreams.

So what's a Wolfgang? He's 70 pounds of pure love.

As I said in an earlier article, Meet My Assistant, Wolfgang Amadeus, Wolfgang and Kanela will do anything for word treats. Please leave them. We are sitting and begging!

Sandra Warholic Seeley is the creator and author of Kanela's Korner and The Sandra Seeley Column. She is a lifelong educator who has taught in Hawaii, where Kanela was born; Bethel Park, where her 3 children were born and in the inner city schools of Pittsburgh Public where her passion for the underprivileged began. Kanela's Korner is often 95% fiction and 5% fact, leaving the reader to do the math. Her motto is: Funny or not, here I come! Her faithful assistant, Wolfgang, is always by her side. He looks just like a black Lab and works for treats. To contact the author, click the following link.

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